flapperorslapper:

Dwight Schrute, a total Whovian, interrogates Nellie Bertram, convinced she’s actually Donna Noble

Dwight: Well, well, well, the most important woman in all of creation chose well. Welcome to Scranton.
Nellie: Oh, I don’t know if I’m the most important. Though I am pretty great.
Dwight: You mean brilliant. His word for you is brilliant, Donna. Or do you really not remember the Doctor and Rose?
Nellie: I’m sorry?
Dwight: Oh, please. Him wiping your mind is no excuse. With my superior brain cells, I’m practically a Time Lord. I could survivor a two-way biological metacrisis - no problem. Idiot.
Nellie: I…uh, let’s talk about your sales.
Dwight: No, let’s talk about the Daleks. Tell me: what Taekwondo move would be most effective in defeating them?
Nellie: Or, um…we could discuss client satisfaction…
Dwight: Or the Judoon. How do they carry out international law so well? Spill.
Nellie: Uh, is Mr. Judoon a client?
Dwight: Don’t play dumb games with me, Donna.  How would one apply to join the Judoon’s mercenary ranks? This is important. I’m worried Kevin might actually be a Slitheen.
Nellie: Oh, is Slitheen a rival company?
Dwight: Now, tell me how I can hire my own Ood.
Nellie: Pardon?
Dwight: Standard butlers have far too complex minds; They may be disobedient. Mose and I would like to employ an Ood.
Nellie: Shall we talk about accounting?
Dwight: No, let’s talk dimensional transcendentalism. How do I achieve it? My car’s a bit small. I’d prefer if it was like the TARDIS.
Nellie: …TARDIS?
Dwight: Yes, Donna. The TARDIS. Ugh, stop it. By order of the Shadow Proclamation, I order you to admit your identity.
Nellie: I’ve told you - Nellie Bertram.
Dwight: Pfft, yeah right. And I’m John Smith.
Nellie: OK, I thought it was Dwight.
Dwight:  What, do you have the mind of an Adipose?! I’d make such a better companion than you. Or maybe I’d do better teaming up with the Master. We’re superior to all you stupid apes.
Nellie: …
Dwight: Wait! I know, we’re living in a parallel world right now, aren’t we? You’ve never met the Doctor? Argh, you need to turn left. Idiot.